Dating Tips For Finding Your Godly Mate

Written by William David Phifer for 3V Magazine

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Proverbs 18:22
“He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the lord”

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers for what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness?

Brothers, I hope that you find these dating tips helpful in finding your Godly mate. First of all, you need to learn how to pick a mate with Godly Character traits.
Being a Christian and member of a church does not inoculate you from being drawn into an unhealthily relationship.   

You must be careful with recreational dating which can lead to destruction. It is often dating where both individuals have no interest in a long term commitment. This dating can lead to “fleshly pleasures” in mind, also with no interest in marriage, and the satisfying of emotional and physical desires in mind.

Brothers, you need to watch from a distance to determine if the person is truly a Christian and truly desiring to live for God. If they don't have a heart for God, why in the world would you even think to develop a relationship with her?  And if you are a young brother, and you have believing parents, it’s really important to get their input concerning a possible spouse. YES, mom and dad giving advise. Why not? They have years of wisdom of knowing what you were like, and they may just discern a good or bad quality in someone that you should be aware of.

When you meet a nice woman, how can you judge whether there is a commitment? Many men look at the outward appearance, but, appearance is not going to matter thirty years from now. What will matter is the character and attitude of the person you married. So look for Godly Character and attitudes. Obviously the most important thing we should all look for is that she has a good relationship with God. Brothers, don't team up with those who are unbelievers. Next, does she have a good relationship with authoritative figures and parents? How does she spend her time and money, is she self centered, and how does she treat her body?                

Defective Dating:
How many brothers you know that during dating situations promise love and affection to someone, only to break their promise?

1 Corinthians 6:18-19 (Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body).
Or do you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?     

You must remember your obedience to God is more important than worldly pleasures. The fact is you're only hurting yourself, someone else and your relationship with God.

Dating tends to skip the friendship stage of a relationship.
“Dinner and a movie” unintentionally focuses more on being a couple than a friendship. Dating often mistakes a physical relationship for love. It often isolates a couple from other vital relationships because they spend all their time with each other. Dating can create an artificial environment for evaluating another person's character. On a date a person can charm a date’s heart. She drives a nice car and pays for everything. Being fun on a date doesn't say anything about a person’s character or ability to be a good wife.
Dating often becomes and end in itself.

Brothers, it’s alright to be friendly in a Godly way. You just need to be careful not to cross biblical lines that God clearly draws for us.
Don't get physical (in any sexual way that's saved until marriage).
Don't develop emotional attachments without marriage commitments you intend to keep.
Don't make promises you don't intend on keeping!
Do wait to start a one person relationship with a person you know you could marry.
Do watch from a distance! Look for proven Godly Character. Too many can put on a good “show” 

Ways to avoid defective dating.
Every relationship is an opportunity to model Christ love.
Don't pursue romantic relationship before you are ready for marriage.
Avoid situations that might compromise the purity of (love) body or mind.
Be sure the person you date know where you stand before you get involved with them. Once you have made a commitment to purity, be prepared to have that commitment tested.
Do seek your parent's and pastor’s input.
Do honor God every step of the way. RUN AWAY FROM SEXUAL SIN.

Principles for beginning your first date.
Before you start dating brothers, remember that your girlfriend is someone's daughter, or sister. Treat her just as you would want a man to treat your daughter, or sister. Your girlfriend’s daddy or brother might be terribly upset if they knew what you plan on doing to them. The wise dating couple understands that their schooling is very important, and mental preparation between classes is essential for proper learning in the classroom.
If your date cheated on her parents (parent), pastor, or her Savior you have absolutely no     guarantee that she will not cheat on you.
Brother, don't thank your girlfriend will make a transformation because she puts on a lovely smile, dress and smell good. Because that same lovely person can change once she stands on a church platform, repeats pretty words or carries some lovely flowers and stands at a church alter.
Before your date, make a Holy vow to God that you will stay pure in your dating. Write your vows from the Bible. Type it on a card, and place it on the bathroom mirror, or on the door of you bedroom so that you will be constantly reminded of your promises to God to stay pure.
Finally, my brothers, date only those people who are approved by parents, parent, pastor,   or your spiritual advisor. Realize that moral purity is a marvelous way to honor your parents, please your pastor and love your heavenly father. If you are truly saved, you are looking for a woman who will serve you and who loves the Lord as much as you do. You are looking for a woman who has kept herself pure for her Lord Jesus Christ.
You are looking for a woman who will not squander your income or lean toward gossip.
I pray that you are blessed with these dating tips, and biblical principles that God has laid out for us in the bible. And you are sure to find a life partner that is suitable, and steadfast.

John 16:24
Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.

GOD BLESS YOU.                       

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